Born in Middlesbrough in 1964, he was christened Graham but called Gram by his Nana. The name stuck. He lived with his grandparents even though his Nana suffered from severe depression. He had no relationship with his father and felt rejected when his mother remarried. 'Throughout childhood,' he says, 'I felt I didn't belong anywhere. I believed that I wasn't loved or accepted.' He thought Jesus was just one of the imaginary characters in his Nana's head.
He led a rebellious childhood. Stealing money for treats led to more serious crimes, and by 16, he was locked up in a Young Offenders Institute. Fighting was his way of looking after himself. 'I started using my fists to win arguments instead of my mouth,' he recalls.
He became one of the hooligans associated with Middlesbrough Football Club. During the 1980s, he went to prison four times for violent crimes. In prison, Gram began questioning his lifestyle, and on his release, he moved away from ‘home ground’. But it wasn't long before the temptations of his old ways led him back into trouble and another prison sentence.
Released in 1992, he returned to Middlesbrough expecting a warm welcome. He was sadly disappointed. He began drinking heavily and taking heroin and crack. 'I was doing anything to get a buzz from life,' he remembers. His world began to unravel – often sleeping on the streets, feeding a habit of 28 pints of White Lightning cider daily.
On the streets, he was befriended by a group from the local church who asked 'Do you know Jesus loves you? I couldn't see where God would fit into my life,' he says. By 1996, Gram says, 'my insides started to shut down as I was abusing them so much'.
He was in a coma for six days. His condition was critical and his family were told to expect the worst. The young Christians turned up at the hospital to pray for him.
‘I woke up and started breathing for myself.’ Gram felt he had cheated death and knew that something special had taken place, but he still needed a purpose to live. ‘But what did Jesus want to know about a scum bag like me?'
Encouraged by his local church, Oakwood Centre, he attended an Alpha course, an invitation to explore the Christian faith. During his time on Alpha, Gram decided to follow Jesus. 'I desperately wanted it to be true, but was scared that nothing would happen.
'I shut my eyes and said: “Jesus, if you are real, words aren't enough. People have told me they loved me all my life, but I never really believed it. I really need to hear it from you that you love me. If you come into my life and show me that you love me, I promise that I’ll tell everyone for the rest of my life on earth that you love them.”’ Jesus proved faithful to His word. This was the start of his new life. Now, Gram is a wonderful friend to many people around his home town and further afield. He’s eager to tell others about God’s love and has seen many lives transformed through his ministry.
Married to Natasha and with two sons, Gram devotes his life to those on the margins, going to schools, prisons and churches to tell people about what God has done for him. He has helped introduce Alpha into prison and offers assistance and encouragement to ex-offenders. Today, he says he has ‘everything I’ve ever dreamed of. It's only Jesus who could have done that for me. Of that I'm certain.'
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